Urinal Etiquette

• Always go to the one furthest away from any being used.
• Never fart loudly and say "Better out than in!"
• Always keep eyes straight in front of you.
• Never try to piss higher than the overflow.
• Do not under any circumstances try to touch the sanitary cubes.
• If only one urinal is left available either use the toilet or hold on for a few minutes. On no account squeeze in.
• Despite alcoholic consumption never try to piss without use of one of your hands guiding your member's directional flow.
• Never attempt any other toilet procedure.
• Limit yourself to only three shakes on finishing - anything more is a criminal offence.

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